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According to the Human Rights Commission of Pakistan, 791 women became victims of “honour killings” in 2010. – File Photo
MULTAN: Being beaten almost daily by her husband is a routine part of Saadia Bibi’s life. “Ever since I was married nearly seven years ago, I have been slapped, punched or kicked virtually every day. Once or twice my husband has burnt me with cigarettes,” she told IRIN, in Multan, displaying the distinct, circular scars on her shoulders and legs.
The “misdemeanours” Saadia has been beaten for include cooking food which is “tasteless”, speaking “too loudly” on the telephone or “arguing back”.
“What I hate is the fact he now also beats our daughters, aged six and five, because he says they must learn to be obedient,” she says while talking to IRIN, the UN Information Unit.
But Saadia, 27, is unable to do very much to alter the situation. “Other women I have spoken to say it is a part of their lives too. What can we do about it?” she asks.
In its 2011 report on Pakistan the UK-based rights watchdog Amnesty International stated: “Gender-based violence, including rape, forced marriages, `honour killings’, acid attacks and other forms of domestic violence, was committed with impunity as police were reluctant to register and investigate complaints.”
Previous studies, including one in 1999 by the New York-based Human Rights Watch (HRW) have come up with similar findings noting that violence against women was an “epidemic”. HRW has since continued to campaign for laws to more effectively protect women.
According to a survey released in June 2011 by Thomson Reuters Foundation’s TrustLaw, (which describes itself as a global hub for free legal assistance and news and information on good governance and women’s rights), Pakistan is the world’s third most dangerous country for women after Afghanistan and the Democratic Republic of Congo, with 90 percent of women suffering domestic violence. Other forms of physical abuse are also common, states the report, based on assessments by gender experts.
“Honour killings”
The consequences for women can be horrendous. In April this year, according to media reports, two men entered the home of 28-year-old Asma Firdous in a village near Multan, cut off six of her fingers, slashed her lips and arms and sliced off her nose. Asma, taken to hospital by her parents, was “punished” for a dispute her husband had with relatives. Her future remains uncertain, with her husband unlikely to accept her back.
According to the autonomous Human Rights Commission of Pakistan (HRCP), 791 women became victims of “honour killings” in 2010. An “honour killing” involves a murder carried out to “save” the perceived “honour” of a family after a woman is accused of “damaging” it in any way. Raped women, those who marry a man of their own choice, or those suspected of any contact with an unrelated man were among those killed. HRCP says the vast majority of domestic violence cases (not necessarily leading to murder) are never reported.
“The problem is that we are a highly patriarchal society. The status of women is low and also brutality is growing by the day,” Gulnar Tabussum, convener for the Women’s Action Forum NGO, told IRIN from Lahore.
A bill aimed at preventing domestic violence lapsed during 2010 because it could not be presented in time to the upper house of parliament.
Dowry woes
As the Thomson Reuters Foundation report points out, Pakistan also has one of the world’s highest rates of murders related to dowry – the money and other gifts given to women at the time of marriage. The tensions this causes, and the violence it can lead to, are experienced by many women.
One of them is Humaira Hamid (not her real name), 21, married a year ago. “My husband and his family kept on demanding more and more gifts from my parents – TV sets, furniture, a washing machine and other items, even though they are not rich and had already given a lot at the time of the actual marriage. Even now the pressure continues, and I am beaten each time a present does not turn up after they have asked for it,” she told IRIN.
Like many other women in the same situation, she does not know what to do or where to turn to. “We are all helpless. My parents will never take me back given the stigma of divorce. It is unacceptable for a woman to live on her own even though I am educated and could support myself and so I have no choice but to try and bear my husband’s violence,” she said. “At least some of my friends are in the same situation – others never talk about it.”
why wont an educated female, working and living on her own be accepted? Thats the tragic part- she cannot even leave the house.Something needs to change and immediately to provide social security to women.
We grew up in a country,where it was very common to get slaped or kicked by parents,teachers,molvies or some one who is older.Respecting a person,his dignity was not very common,you humiliate some one by slapping that person in public by not respecting his ego,seen its very common and still is that a financially weaker person easily get slapped by any one right in the middle of a street.That human right violation,just naturally carry on by victims of humiliation to others & its just normal for that person is to do the same with some one,who is weaker then him/her,especially a women.laws are still their but lack of implementation is just not stopping people from crimes.
I agree that domestic violence is a big problem in Pakistan. But the solutions the NGO's and UN advocate are widely implemented in the west but still domestic violence is the number one cause of violence against women here in the U.S as well. So cultural traditions and trying to educate is not the solution. I don't have a solution but I guess neither does anyone else …..
This is a curse to almost every society in the world which comes down to bottom line Education, Dollar$&Cents. If you see movie "BOLL" same story what happens to economically struggling family.
Care and compassion for the circumstances of the victims is needed in all of humanity. Most societies choose penalties for those actually subjected to judicial law. However, only education and societies efforts to change ATTITUDES concerning abuse will make a difference in the lives of victims and abusers. Change is possible, and the real men in a society need to speak out against domestic violence and encourage one another to find alternative ways of dealing with conflict. I have seen abusers whom have changed their ways, with God all things are possible.
I agree, but the situation is no different in our country too.
Most of the men are jobless and they commit these type of crimes out of frustation.
The Human Right Activists and the feature writer journalists should continue their followup on their findings on each case.
do these self professed man forget that they were born to a woman. Beating daughters to teach obedience? Why does the law does not do anything about it?
Most of the men are jobless and they commit these type of crimes out of frustation.
Quote "Most of the men are jobless and they commit these type of crimes out of frustation"–Quote Unquote….. so you beat the women???? so it's wife's fault if you dont have a job?? is that your excuse?? so you would batter your wife if you had no job?? How can you justify that???? i think the wife beaters are nothing but sadist cowards!!!
The Human Right Activists and the feature writer journalists should continue their followup on their findings on each case.
Let us start accepting these poor women in the society and offer them refuge in our lives and homes if they are divorced. I would highly urge these battered women to seek divorce from their husbands. We need to have an NRO to support and stand for these poor women.
Contact me if I could be of further help.
Voilence against women in pakistan is a common trait and nothing to be surprised about..this is how the system has been since the past so many years and will continue so… only tightening of rule of law….and this is because our own police officers are afraid of the husband.
This negative thought gain strength when a child(boy) see distinction (in almost all social and economic matters) in the eyes of his own parents for a son and a daughter. There is a need to change this materialistic thought from the root. "Respect Humanity"
the best response and thoroughly heart felt and closest to the core to this article has been I feel provided by 'no one'.
And you have contribued…how??
Only a coward can hit a woman. As a Muslim we should follow the example of our beloved prophet who treated his wives and other women with respect and kindness. I think domestic violence laws should be strict and must be enforced. What a shame we treat our mothers sisters and wives this way and call ourselves Muslims and civilized.
One practical solution would be to have this issue highlighted in the sermons of Friday prayers and ask the faithfuls to avoid domestic violence and other injustices against women and to impart the true teacihings of Islam to have domestic harmony
Agreed. Just use the examples of our prophet. He is the greatest of all examples.
'Domestic Violence" is wrong and bad. It happens in every society. Men must hand their head in shame if they are a part ot it. In US domestic viloence is there too but beleive me if a child or a woman calls the police they come, talk to each one of them separately and haul off the husband to jail. This does not exist in our society as we all have false family pride etc.
In muslim soceity divorce seems to be easy. This must stop through educxation
No doubt domestic violence happens in UK and US too, inspite of all the protections available to women
Domestic violence does happen in the US and the UK, the difference is what I, as a woman in the US can do about it. IF my husband were to start beating me, I could have him arrested or I could leave him. I am allowed to live independently and support myself in the US. My parents probably wouldn't feel shamed if I divorced an abusive husband, and many women in that situation can move back in with their families.
just giving comments is not the solution. We as a nation needs to understand and practice the moral and ethical values that Islam gave us.
Domestic voilence has nothing to do with our religion.
Another sad report on domestic violence. And yet I see comments that oh by the way it happens in US and UK also. This is happening in Pakistan and is an issue at home. Let's resolve our own issues first before dragging other countries. Let's find a solution instead of self denials.
Husband should be flogged, whipped and slapped in public. That is my solution. Until then this will go on and on.
These poor women are victim of tribal laws and men with severe
"obsessive compulsive disorders" OCD…by the way OCD is mentioned in the Quran…..Satan is nothing more than our selfish desires…its no demon with two horns on its head….
Accusing other societies simply unveils people who are not responsible enough help their own people to change their own societies for the better.
No wonder Pakistan is in the state of turmoil. We are muslims and believe in God and read Quran, and yet, our actions are contrary to the teachings of Islam, not just in extending love and protection to our women, but also in every other sphere of life. Remember with injustice comes God wrath and we'll not be spared just because we are muslims.
What does "being a muslim" has to do with beating the spouse? We don't need Islam or any other religion to tell us that it is wrong.
Why do you involve religion in this? This is just a cruelty and inhuman treatment of fellow human being which needs to be punished by Law and addressed by the Government and Society at large. Please understand the situation and make education a priority for girls so they understand their rights in the Society. I think the best course of action will be the spouse of Prime Minister and all the high ranking ladies in the Society should take a stand and continue to provide relief to these unfortunate victims.
Asif is right in what he said, in Islam, females are to be respected. Where a female is subjected to injustice, Allah will not bless that place. We, as muslims should just not preach but put it in practice. Practice, that is what we are lacking behind.
Such Domestic Violence is a curse. In the best of my knowledge I feel that Islam never allows such practice. Treating your partner in an honorable and respectful manner fetches great respect and fidelity.
Pak must enact a strong law. Social activist must be active on this front.
you are quite right Islam teaches equality in husband n wife relationship. the only dowry that exists i Islam is "Meher" a husbands monetary gift to wife at the time of wedding.
I agree, but the situation is no different in our country too.
And we call ourselves "Muslims". Where does in Quran says, beat up your helpless wife or children, or kill some one in the sake of honour. Our society is just male dominant society, nothing less, nothing more. It is a shame, not only for Pakistanis every where, but in the name of "Islam" too. These same men, when do go abroad, why can't they beat up on these poor souls, only because, there is a law and order in other countries. Pakistan is a barbaric country, where you can do any thing you wants too, and no one cares about it.
Aqil Siddiqi (B.C,Canada)
It feels good to call your own country barbaric doesn't it? We don't bother doing anything about it and then we complain, what's the point of complaining then?
There is someone many of us can and are doing about it. We are teaching our children to not follow in this practice of demoralizing the opposite sex. We may not be able to change a society as a whole but there is always a start. First, condemn this practice, secondly, teach the right ways to our own family members, be it children, brothers, sister, uncles, aunts, cousins, etc. 1 family at a time, we CAN change a society, even from abroad.
And have you done anything, or you are one of those who beats his wife to take their own frustrations out. Atleast people are talking about it, this is the first step.
Shiraz, domestic violence happens in all countries of the world,rich or poor but the reasons are different. Reasons in USA and Europe are not domination, dowry, lack of education, sense of owning etc.. its money, drinking, work related. There is no excuse for domestic violence, we are not living in the stone ages of Arabia, this is the modern world read your Quran and Hadith read your rights as a man and women, it is all spelled out. If you or anyone else has problems understanding them please ask some LEARNED ulema and not your basic UNEDUCATED person who has memorized the Quran with no understanding of what he is reciting. If you look or research it you can find a treasure trove of knowledge on the Internet, go with the authentic translations. We are blindly following the culture and not the religion. Empower yourself with the knowledge and challenge these tribal followers that are being blindly led by the blind. Education is power.
Mr. Shiraz, I am not so much concerned about the domestic violence in the West. I am concerned about the poor women in my own country because I know for sure it is a male dominant country and we really have no law and order. Don't worry about the West and ask what you can do to make it better for our own poor women
Domestic violence happens in Europe and America too, but we must not forget the victims being talked about here.
abuse of women and children happens probably 100000s of times every day in every part of the globe. it's hardly astonishing news. but a society that tolerates it, a nation that does nothing when vulnerable people are attacked, a police force that ignores brutal domestic assaults, an imam who does not call for punishment of the abuser, a family that is so cold and unloving that it allows their own daughter and their grandchildren to be beaten and maimed, a family that supports the sadistic animal- that is beneath contempt. i know it is immoral and depraved.
All of thesse things which are Domestic violence do happen in UK, US and other western countries. I'd love you to report those as well.
Yes you are correct, domestic violence also takes place in US and the Western countries but once reported or if you get caught there are severe penalties but as the author pointed out there is no such luck for women in Pakistan.
However, there are no such things as honor killings or Dowry issues in US and the Western countries. Also, the women is protected if she files for divorce as she get almost 50% of the husbands earnings in child support plus alimony which enables her to easily take care of herself even if she is not highly educated or is a housewife with no work experience. Again, no such luck for women in Pakistan they have no one to turn to. The law and the society in Pakistan favors the male and as it is evident with the male dominance in every field of life.
Excellent response Nadeem.
Just because it is happening in some other country, does NOT make it justifiable in any way in Pakistan. You should be more concerned about what's happening in Pakistan. Let the US/UK and other Western countries deal with their own problems.
it isnt the 'domestic violence' that is astonishing; it is a 'person' who minimizes sadistic, animal behavior toward vulnerable people with pale terms like 'domestic violence' and tries to excuse and ignore it by saying 'it happens in other countries'. these things do happen in UK, US and other western countries, but at least the citizens of these countries, every single individual, every single religious, civil, legal organization will move to protect the abused and punish the abuser. they do not excuse it by saying 'everyone else is doing it, too.' it is not the depravity of such individual sadism that is 'news'; it is the depravity of a society that tolerates and excuses it.
Violence against women is wrong and must be condemned. It exists in many countries including western countries. It is not a monopoly of third world or Islamic countries.
Despite the advances in science and education, violence against women is very common in western world.
We need tougher laws and implementation with full vigor to eliminate this menace.