Finally the Swiss letter has been written
The only barrier to end corruption in Pakistan and bring the Caliphate of the objective resolution and caretaker set up is the Swiss letter. Prime Minister Joseph Guillotine was not a good Muslim (Article 63-1-g) and he refused to write the Swiss letter. Another PM is going to lose his job and the seat of Gujjar Khan soon. The deadlock over the Swiss letter is the mother of all problems in Pakistan. This issue is shaking the foundation and DPC (damp proofing course) of Pakistan.
The Mutaweens of Constitution have hit the road to impose the supremacy of constitution, but the Illuminati and liberal Scumanati are out to destroy the revolution of Burgeratti. The keyboard nationalist, G3 jihadists, Wi-Fi revolutionaries and status quo slayers are also blasting away on their keyboards from the Gloria Jeans Café to end the politics of status quo and bring revolution that was stuck in the traffic of Shahdara bridge.
In the larger interest of Pakistan’s Caliphate, I have decided to write the letter myself in the Swiss national language (German) to Swiss Authorities. And since the ex-president of France, al Jacuzzi is also part of kickbacks, I am also sending a French letter to the French courts. A copy is attached herewith.
To,
Ehrenhaft chef justice, (Honourable chief justice)
Schweizer föderalistisch Gericht (Swiss Federal court)
DieSchweiz. (Switzerland)
Mein Herr! (Lord!)
With all due Respekt, I beg to informieren you that I am al Bakistanisch Bürger (citizen) and am writing this as no Bakistanischi can write a Buchstabe (letter) in Schweizer Sprache (Swiss language) as our volks Sprache (national language) is Arabisch. Al Bakistanisch is the seventh Atomkraft (nuclear power) of the world and 147th on human development index because of the Swiss Letter. The political demokratish government of PPP refuses the orderisch of supreme kourt to write a Buchstabe to your lordshipistch because they are all illiterati and can only write SMS messages.
Mein Führer,
Die ex High Kourt Richter (judge) Malik Abdul Qayyum had found die Asifisch Zardari guilty of charges framed by al Talwarur Rehmanisch dictated by Schabaz Scharrif on telefon. The transcriptsch of the telefon konversation is attasched. Nawaztch Scharrif die Prime Minister of al Bakistanisch had initiated the kase in Canton of Geneva, Schweiz in 1998 which akkused Benatzir Bhutto and Asifisch Zardari to have embezzled $60 million in kickbacks stasched in Schweizer bank akkounts. Die Talwar ur Rehmanisch had communischted with die Ehrnhaft chef justice to openischet die kases in Schweizer Confoederatio Helvetica. We, the volks of al Bakistanisch, want you to open the cases with Swiss Messer (knife) as al Bakistanisch Talwar ur Rehmanischis residing in Abu Dhabi.
Please issue the verdict like Malik Abdul Qayyum urgently undstrafen (punish) the Präsident of Al Bakistanisch for corruption so that the revolution of burgers and Burgerins can come to Bakistanisch.
Also the Bürgers, Sandwiches, and al Schwarmas of al Bakistanisch want the Honourable Richter (judge) to open the Missing persons case und Mehran Bank Skandal case and my property dispute with my brother in canton of al Beshawar. All other problems of al Bakistanisch have been solved, Blitzkrieg of Taliban silenced, load-shedding was solved eons ago, the per capita income is equal to Swiss burgers.
The volks (nation) of al Bakistanisch would be grateful if you free the Fernsehen (television) anchors, who are krying hoarse day and nacht (night) on the issue of writing a Buchstabe to your Lordshipistch. I am writing this Buchstabe to end the konflikt in al Bakistanisch, and bring back the Zeitgeist of Mahmud of Ghazna to be the rulers and collectors of bounty of all the welt (world).
Gottmituns (God be with us).
Beste Regards,
Burgers of al Bakistanisch.
The author left architecture for painting but ended up as a cartoonist and now writes Hijjo. He is the jack of all trades.
The views expressed by this blogger and in the following reader comments do not necessarily reflect the views and policies of the Dawn Media Group.
i suggest the apposition parties in Pakistan should start hunger strike in front of Swiss embassy in islamabad for opening swiss cases. In this way at least one side of the present leadership will be finish.
nice effort
i want to write a letter like that in CHINESE ENGLISH plz help
i am so shocked to see many YAHOO SERIOUS types posting comments here…….Take a chill pill fellows !!!!
This is merely an attempt to remind us somethings we are forgetting as time is passing by, in a very funny way.
Enjoy it instead of cribbing over it.
This is truly entertaining yet very cutting article…
nice
Author tried to create humour but failed completely.
Dislike…It was a waste of time.
nice but letter in german is called Der Brief. Buchstabe means alphabetical letter.
the best in the town, two thumbs up for sabir.
Totally agree with Shiraz !
excellent article!
The powerfull need immunity to protect themselves from the weak and the poor!! …. what a time to be alive!
All other problems… ha ha what a term to undermine the problem under focus. I can write a similar piece for every 'other' problem faced by Pakistan. but I know one thing – corruption, corrupt elite and poor governance would be at the core of every problem
love this ..
I only read a few lines and realized it is nothing but a tasteless joke.
We should know that the issue of swiss letter will not go away easily. One solution is let the Prime Minister write the letter as ordered by court. There is no specific order at this point of time to mail the letter.
Well! …. That's settled finally! …. Now can we get on with matters that pressing and need urgent attention like "giving jobs to the Taliban in the military and judiciary to pacify them??
marvelous effort sir
Excellent article.
No laughing matter.
The office of the President of Pakistan cannot be placed under a foreign prince or a magistrate or a judge.
To do so amounts to treason against the state of Pakistan.
A novel idea!
buchstabe is not the correct word for a letter it means alphabet (character or letter in that sense). The correct word in Deutsch for letter as requested by SC is "brief". Please never translate directly from google just ask someone who knows the language.
very nice stuff, well written
Excellent and Comprehensive…
Bien sur vous's accoupler.
Bien jouer.
Not a Cartoonist but a cartoon, with no sense of the gravity of NRO and swiss bank Issue…It is nearly impossible for any reasonable law-abiding person to digest this.