Why did your sister cut a hole in her new umbrella?

Because she wanted to be able to tell when it stopped raining.

******

Father: Why did you put a toad in your sister’s bed?

Son: I couldn’t find a spider.

******

Why did your brother shoot the alarm clock?

Because he felt like killing time.

******

Why did your sister wear a wet shirt all day?

Because the label said, ‘Wash and wear’.

******

Why does your sister pick up soap bubbles and put them to her ear?

Because she likes soap operas.

******

Why did your brother feed money to her cow?

Because he wanted to get rich milk.

******

A little boy came home from his first day at kindergarten and said to his mother, “What’s the use of going to school? I can’t read, I can’t write and the teacher won’t let me talk.”

******

“I hope you’re not one of those boys who sits and watches the school clock,” said the principal to a new boy.

“No, sir. I’ve got a digital watch that bleeps at 1’O clock.”

******

“Hello, Billy. Do you like your new school?” asked Uncle Ned.

”Sometimes,” said the boy.

”When is that?”

”When it’s closed!”                 — Compiled by The Surfer