Considering the myriad of diversions, entertainment and attractions available thanks to technology today, we, the generation which grew up with one TV channel, might think that our kids have no opportunity to get bored.

However, my 10-year-old daughter claims loudly that she’s bored stiff even if she’s just walked into the house after playing outdoors with her friends for hours or finished watching her favourite show on TV.

“It’s this generation!” says Marya, mother of four, rolling her eyes in exasperation. “The more options our kids have, the lesser their attention span is and the greater their tendency to get distracted.”

When it comes to children’s overall development, leisure time activities are just as important as traditional education

But to be fair, this generation also has less time to spare because of being the offspring of an ambitious generation of parents.

Mahmood and Saira, both doctors by profession, are very vigilant about their children’s spare time. “Children’s leisure time should be divided equally for sport, self-education and entertainment. I make sure my daughters, aged six and 10, spend time in swimming and horse riding to release the stress they face at school. For entertainment we take them for age-appropriate movies at the multiplex. We carefully monitor that they read the right books for relaxation. What do kids know about utilising spare time? Parents have to guide them,” the focused father declares.

Twelve-year-old Emaad declares very stoically that he has no free time, “What free time? During school days I don’t get time to breathe. After returning from a gruelling day at school, my mom’s hauling me all evening from one extra class or tuition to another. The afternoon time when she naps is the only free time I get and I escape to my apartment compound to join in a game of cricket. Weekends are usually spent playing video games online with my mates or my sister, and at night I sit down with a game of cards with my grandparents.” TV apparently is not a part of Emaad’s life. Kudos to the mom!

“For summer, I am always on the lookout for a camp. There is no other way to channelise their energy. I don’t want couch potatoes; kids will be kids and will not do productive things on their own — they have to be given the right exposure,” says Atiya, a working mother of a teenage daughter and son.

However, her kids feel that their mother is a slave driver and has sky-high expectations, “I know she does it for our own good but sometimes it’s all overwhelming. I dream about just lazing around in front of the TV or chatting on my phone like my other classmates but my parents feel it’s a cardinal sin to waste time.”

But more often than not, if we look into what kids today are doing in their spare time, most parents throw up their hands in despair and lament over how TV, tablets, video games and smartphones have inexorably hypnotised their kids.

“My daughter has just turned three, yet, all she wants is my smartphone to play games on or watch videos,” says Tania. “No matter how hard I try to distract her with educational toys or books, she will whine for my mobile phone. Sometimes, I just give in to her because I know it will keep her glued and I’ll be able to get my chores done,” she admits regretfully.

“Making kids spend their free time productively requires the parent to be actively involved and being in a joint family that is something I cannot manage. I envy my friends who take out quality time to plan their kid’s activities but they’re the ones who have maids and servants at their beck and call.”

“My six-year-old is looking for an opportunity to play games on his tablet and my teenager is constantly chatting on Whatsapp and Facebook. She is perpetually glued to the smartphone we got her for her birthday,” says Mansoor.

“All I see my kids doing is making funny videos of their friends, taking selfies and using Instagram,” wails Fatema, mother of two teenagers.

But kids are savvy and feel that they use technology productively. “I use YouTube for free style and figurative sketching. I think it’s like an online class and I learn so much. My walls are filled with my drawings,” says 11-year-old Deena, an aspiring artist.

Arifa, mother of three girls agrees, “The internet is God-sent for research for school assignments. My older two who are in their teens are quite self-entertaining. They enjoy reading — iPad surfing and especially Pinterest. They are all artsy so I let them use the iPad to look for art, crochet, stitching and craft-related videos. But it all depends on their mood. My youngest who is eight loves playing by herself or writing,” she finishes with a content smile.

However, in the presence of technology outdoor recreation suffers. And it’s a great loss because, after all, what’s a childhood without outdoor games? “Time spent outdoors depends on the vicinity where you live. We live in an overcrowded area in Saddar and there’s no way I can go down to play,” says nine-year-old Rabia. “Instead I spend my time reading and doing art.”

“Friends and gadgets are what kids today are deeply influenced by. But one must remember that time spent with elders is vital for deep filial bonding, for inculcating morals, etiquettes and personality development.”

Samra, who lives in Clifton in a huge apartment complex with a garden, is grateful for the green space her kids have to play, “My daughters play throw ball and badminton with their neighbourhood friends every evening. It’s safe for them to play in an enclosed yet spacious area and it helps let off steam! Girls in our part of the world only get to do so till a particular age.”

Farheen, an active mom of three hyperactive kids, says that she encourages her two sons and daughter to ride their bikes in their neighbourhood near the beach, “They are also memorising the Quran and apart from that they go for tuitions and swimming everyday too.”

“My sons are seven and 10 and they have so much energy that I have involved them in karate, swimming and tennis at the local club,” says Mahira. “It’s only on the weekends that they are allowed to spend time on their PlayStation and iPad.”

“My 10-year-old son is a cricket fan,” says Asiyah. “He plays in his school team and when he comes home he plays with his neighbourhood friends. That’s all he does in his spare time,” she shares ruefully.

Time flies if one is a book reader. Razia is one of those few blessed mother’s whose 11-year-old daughter, Zahra, is a voracious reader. “She is constantly reading on Kindle and issuing books from her school library,” she smiles. “In fact, it is a task for me to get her to pick up a school book. All her friends are avid bookworms too so that really helps add fuel to her fire. Her book reading has given her an edge in school and among her peers — she’s more confident and informed and has excellent command over the English language.”

“My kids are both under five years and they are going through a Lego-obsession phase. It keeps them occupied for a few hours,” says Rahila. “It’s just tough clearing up and sorting out the itsy-bitsy pieces from under the bed and rugs,” she laughs.

Kids are perhaps happiest when with their friends. “My daughter will spend the entire Saturday with her neighbour who is also her best friend; they’re inseparable,” says Masooma, mother of a teenager. “They watch movies together or go to the mall to window shop and gossip all day. Watching her reminds me of my childhood and how I would discuss everything under the sun with my best friend. A good friend can surely make adolescence much easier,” she says wistfully.

Nimra, who is a child psychologist, believes that children are spending less time with their parents. “Friends and gadgets are what kids today are deeply influenced by. But one must remember that time spent with elders is vital

for deep filial bonding, for inculcating morals, etiquettes and personality development.”

Perhaps the need of the age is to raise independent kids and expose them tactfully to a number of activities which can stimulate their interests, so that their leisure time can do what it is supposed to do — help them relax and feel rejuvenated! In a nutshell, help them fully live their fleeting childhood in this fast-paced, frenzied, stressful world.

Published in Dawn, Sunday Magazine, July 17th, 2016