"You seem to have lost weight.”

“Looking good, what have you been eating?”

For many women, sometimes the sweetest words aren’t “I love you” but “Have you lost weight?” Anyone who has battled with the demon of obesity will know how easy it is to pack on the pounds and how difficult it is to shed them.

Determination and not crash diets will see you through weight loss

In a culture, where the ideal of physical beauty is often equated with being slim, women who are overweight are often blamed for their obesity and called weak-willed, unattractive and even lazy. Obesity has a far-reaching negative effect on the overall quality of life. While the physical effects may include increased risk of heart disease, high blood pressure, cancer and diabetes, the emotional trauma attached to being overweight has an equally debilitating effect — moreso on women than on men. For many women, obesity becomes a stigma and increases their risk of falling prey to low self-esteem, emotional disorders, eating problems, impaired body image and depression.

But there are always exceptions. Here are stories of a few inspirational women who suffered from body shaming regarding their weight issues. But instead of giving in to depression and pessimism, they decided to take control of their own lives and became source of great inspiration for others.

Ameena, a housewife and mother to a toddler, used gained a lot of weight after marriage. “I made half-hearted attempts to lose weight but they were not successful,” she says. The realisation that obesity can lead to many diseases was a cause of serious concern. “This became a turning point in my life. Two months after giving birth, I started my weight loss journey. By eating only homemade healthy foods and limiting my intake of sugar, oil and junk food, I have reduced almost nine kilos in three months.”

Sadaf Sajid, a clinical dietician who is currently pursuing her MPhil in Community Health and Nutrition, says, “Obesity is a lifestyle problem. Eating more junk and processed food and less homemade food are major contributors to obesity. During my practice, I often hear women complain that they don’t eat anything but still get fat.” They often expect a miracle medicine which will melt away the fat within days — a very unrealistic expectation. Looking for shortcuts is the biggest mistake people make when it comes to weight loss, sasy the dietician.

To anyone who wants to lose weight, Ameena’s advice is to have eight to 10 glasses of water every day, use green tea instead of milk tea and be conscious of what one eats, especially when dining out. She stresses: “Get rid of the late-night eating habit.”

In the journey of weight loss, an inspirational tale of faith and self-belief is that of Rizwana who is in her early 40s. She attributes her success in battling obesity to her unwavering sprit. “I was always overweight but my parents taught me to live my life with courage and dignity. Because of their love and support, I was able to brush aside any negative comments regarding my physique,” she says.

In 2013, Rizwana started suffering from sciatica pain, and “had to offer my prayers while sitting in a chair. Then I went for Umrah but I wasn’t in good physical shape and constantly felt very tired there.” It was then that she badly realised that health is very important and being overweight is like having a serious disease. “In 2016, one of my college friends introduced me to a weight loss group on Facebook,” says Rizwana. “As I am an excellent cook, my cooking skills helped me immensely in coming up with healthy, low calories recipes. So from 130kg, I now weigh about 71kg. This was a miracle in my life and I never lost motivation.”

Rizawan’s weight loss journey is not over yet. She is working towards her goal of weighing 65kgs, which she hopes to achieve in the coming few months. Clean eating helped her a great deal along with focus on changing her lifestyle. “I reduced my social life so that I could focus on my goal.,” she says. “My colleagues supported my efforts and my weight loss achievements have inspired many of them to adopt healthier eating habits.”

Rizwana’s advice to losing weight is to first and foremost analyse one’s eating habits and physical activities and address unhealthy practices immediately. “You are not answerable to anyone so don’t lose weight to please others. Never be impatient. There will be bad times and bouts of low self-esteem. It’s very normal and natural. Join a weight loss group for yummy low-carb recipes and support, and download a fitness app to monitor your progress,” she says.

For healthy and sustainable weight loss, Sajid recommends, “Listen to your body. Your body tells you which foods create problems for you. Do not eat food just because it’s available or you are bored. Our body is like a complex machine. Good quality fuel means a healthy and productive life and bad fuel or limited fuel means a breakdown of our normal functions.”

Humaira, a senior accounts manager in her late 20s describes the stigma attached to obesity in our society. “People think we are aliens without any feelings. They think it is their right to stare or make rude comments and do not realise how such remarks can hurt our sentiments,” she says. “My mother often had to hear, ‘Aap ki beti kaafi moti hai, [your daughter is quite fat]’.”

Something as simple as shopping can be a traumatic experience when your body looks different from the average. When Humaira went shopping and wouldn’t fit into her favourite dress, it would upset her. When one of her friends encouraged her to lose weight, she decided to change her life “but it is not an easy journey. I work for overseas clients so I can’t keep normal timings for eating. Going to the gym was also very difficult,” she says.

Humaira also stresses that women should focus on healthy eating and say no to sugar, oily and junk foods. Bakery items must be totally avoided and 40-60 minutes of brisk morning walk is a must for healthy weight loss. She reiterates that the key is determination and self-motivation. “Keeping yourself motivated is in your own hands. Set a goal for your weight loss and exercise at home by watching YouTube videos. There’s no need to waste money on gym fee. Don’t let negative comments from other people discourage you and never take weight loss pills. Nothing is more precious than your health.”

“It’s hard, but it’s not impossible,” says Summaya, a dynamic young woman who lives in Dubai. She started to gain weight after getting married in 2013 and became almost over 24kg overweight. “I was seriously stressed out and losing my confidence,” she says. Weight gain increased her glucose and cholesterol levels; she also began to experience other health issues such as irregular menstrual cycles, palpitations, depression and shortness of breath. “I felt as if I was losing my mobility and I knew I had to do something about this situation. Losing weight wasn’t easy for a junkaholic like me but I wanted to improve my health at any cost. I started doing regular workouts and it took me about seven to eight months to reduce my weight from 86kg to 66kg.”

According to Summaya, the hardest part is giving up addictive unhealthy foods to which and adopting healthier choices. The satisfaction one gets from feeling fit, healthy and strong is something that keeps one going, she says. “My healthy diet includes nutrient-rich foods, such as legumes, fruits and veggies, low-fat dairy products, whole grains, lean protein and nuts. My daily calorie intake is 1,500 to 1,800 as compared to before when her daily intake was 2,500 to 3,000 calories.” Her final advice: “Never give up.”

From 110kg to 78kg in 15 months, Farah’s weight loss journey is exemplary of what consistency and patience can achieve. “Before starting, keep in mind that a negative mind can never produce a positive result. So believe that you can do it and do not underestimate your will power,” she says. “I used to rely on processed food and rarely ate homemade food but at my heaviest, I started suffering from back pain, aching heels, hormonal imbalance, mood swings, dull skin and a seriously messed up menstrual cycle. Then I found I had fatty liver which shocked me to the core. Ignoring my obesity was no longer an option. I treated my weight as an illness and adopted a complete change in lifestyle and clean eating habits rather than fad diets. My exercise routine consists of brisk walk, Tiffany Rothe workouts and elliptical machine.”

After losing weight, Farah no longer needed to buy dresses in large size. She was elated. She realised how her patience, hard work and consistency have paid off. Farah shares: “When it comes to taking control of your life, there’s no tomorrow. There’s only today and now is the time. Make yourself a priority. Unless you are happy and healthy, you cannot take care of your family.”

Dietician Sajid recommends eating a nutritious breakfast; keeping lunch light with lots of proteins, yoghurt and sautéed or baked vegetables; having a handful of nuts and fruits as snacks but avoiding fried stuff; and eating your last meal at least three hours before going to bed. “Keep yourself hydrated with lots of water intake to boost metabolism,” she says. “Adopt healthy choices when dining out. Avoid carbonated drinks and packaged juices at all costs. Keep portion sizes small. You can have up to six meals a day but keep the quantity small. And brisk walking for 30-45 minutes on a regular basis can do miracles for you which diets cannot.

Sajid emphasises: “Obesity cannot be generalised; hence the same diet cannot produce miracle results for everyone. Even if you lose a few pounds with a fad diet, not only will they come back with a vengeance, it will also cause lots of other health issues for you, like gall bladder stones, hair loss, irritability, lethargy and weakness. So aim for gradual weight loss that can be sustained with healthy lifestyle and not crash diets.”

Sadaf’s final advice: “Lose your weight, not your hope.”

Published in Dawn, EOS, April 1st, 2018