A SMALL part of me agrees with actor Noman Ijaz who took to Instagram to slam critics of Anant Ambani’s wedding. The family spent their own money so they should be allowed to enjoy it as they wish, he wrote. I thought this at first, as I eye-rolled my way through images of the pre-wedding in March but then cringed at the pure spectacle on display last month. I disagree with Ijaz when he said “you should pray you have that kind of money for that kind of wedding”.

Err… I think going beyond one’s means when planning a wedding continues to be a cause of so many problems in the subcontinent. The poor go into debt; the rich go berserk.

I think the word ‘shaadi’ meaning both wedding and marriage is another problem because they are not the same thing. There is an entire industry in Pakistan propped up to prepare the rich and the wannabe rich for a wedding — choreographers, make-up artists for the bride and groom’s parties, photographers, video filmmakers who then release slickly edited films on social media. The focus has become on getting the right shot(s) for Instagram, and now includes invitations telling guests what colours to wear for which events.

Ijaz was not commenting on this part of the industry. He was responding to actor Arsalan Naseer who poked fun at how relationships do not last as long as this Ambani wedding. This was one of the kinder comments about an event, which by the way, is still going on. After an engagement party in January, a pre-wedding celebration in March where Rihanna performed for $5 million, a European cruise in Italy in May, a masquerade ball also in May in France, then back to Italy for an evening event where Andrea Bocelli performed, and the actual wedding in Mumbai, there’s something happening in London, probably now.

The wedding was less a celebration of love and more a show of power.

It is Ambani’s choice to put up a rather gross display of wealth but let’s not forget how he got here — reportedly getting contracts, resources and protected land for a pittance and by cosying up to politicians to get loans waived off. He has exploited the system but people in power love that he makes India look good because he brings the big bucks.

This wedding was less a celebration of love and more a show of power and clout. I understand a shaadi is about two families more than the individuals. It’s probably why we call it an arranged marriage, compared to love marriage which translates to families getting no benefits.

Everyone knows Ambani spent $600m at this wedding but I’m curious to hear what he — and India plus its billionaires — will earn as a result of this wedding.

If the Jamnagar airport was declared an international one in March to accommodate guests like Mark Zuckerberg and Bill Gates, think of what else will open up for tycoons.

An Oxfam report last year said India’s richest one per cent owned 40pc of the country’s wealth. I was horrified to read an article in Time magazine which reported “that the gap between India’s rich and poor is now so wide that by some measures, there was more equality in India under British colonial rule than today”, and dubbed it a “Billionaire Raj”.

Indians spent $75 billion last year in the luxury wedding market, according to LiveMint which estimated it could grow between 7pc to 8pc annually.

The message is clear: spend big, reap big — whether it’s financial or social capital or pushing forward how great India is.

Lest we get ahead of ourselves and think ‘this is not us’ let me add: I have seen a video of a bride making a grand entrance in a cra­ne. Then there’s a groom who arriv-­ed on top of a cag­ed lion in 2017. A quick search on ‘Pakistan’s most expensive wedd­ings’ tells a story about the marriage of political and business interests and features destination weddings, lots of bling, and a groom’s arrival in a helicopter.

The real story is about the widening economic inequality. The number of Indians living below the poverty line amounted to 10.2pc of the population in 2023 according to the World Bank, whereas the figure for Pakistan was 37.2pc. There is a boiling undercurrent of rage that no one is addressing beyond political sloganeering. Power (read: wealth) remains in the hands of a very small circle and their children are bartered in marriage to maintain that structure.

There is never any talk about the redistribution of wealth. How can there be in an oligarchy? Instead, we’re all fixated on ‘this new level of rich people watching’ as Leanne Delap wrote in Toronto Star but I assure you it’s not harmless fun. It is a reminder that such weddings are a symptom of our rotten system begging for an overhaul.

The writer is a journalism instructor.

X: LedeingLady

Published in Dawn, July 28th, 2024