Type 2 eyewash

Published November 6, 2024 Updated November 6, 2024 07:36am
The writer is an industrial engineer and a volunteer social activist.
The writer is an industrial engineer and a volunteer social activist.

EYEWASH arrangements are usually required at two locations: in industry, to provide emergency eye decontamination when a worker’s eyes are exposed to harmful chemicals, dust or material; and in politics, to throw dust into the eyes of the people by repeatedly hurling misleading or illusory statements, plans or promises at them.

While the first is classified as a desirable ‘emergency control’, the second, or Type 2 eyewash is considered deceptive and detrimental. This article endeavours to explain how Type 2 eyewash has come to be accepted as a ‘standard operating procedure’ and how to treat this malaise.

On May 8, 2024, the prime minister, in a state of excitement, launched a fiery Type 2 eyewash, saying, “Today, with iron conviction … we will handle the challenge of 26 million out-of-school children. I declare from this moment an Emergency in Education all over Pakistan”. Four months later, on Sept 8, 2024, jolted by International Literacy Day (and having forgotten what he said earlier), he launched the same imaginary educational emergency. These outbursts weren’t based on prior research, thought or planning. Such emotional eruptions are not known for improving school enrolment numbers.

Type 2 eyewashes are typically launched by announcing a ‘week’ or a ‘drive’ — for example, a ‘cleanliness’, ‘anti beggary’, ‘ban-the-plastic-bag’ or ‘austerity’ drive. The ‘austerity drives’, however, get the prize for the best optical illusions. Consider, three austerity drives that were launched in the last 14 months, ie, the National Austerity Committee, a committee on the reduction of government expenditure, and the Committee on Rightsizing of the Federal Government. All they did was to recommend reducing government departments from 53 to 52.

Learn to differentiate between wishes, facts and hot air.

Taking advantage of this smokescreen, the Punjab government decided to dent the exchequer by its wasteful expenditure of Rs617m — even before the arrival of IMF money — on the purchase of 79 new luxury vehicles. This uncontrolled binge came only after similar luxury vehicles worth Rs180m had already been purchased for the Punjab Assembly two months earlier.

Not to be left behind, the Sindh government, in September 2024, decided to spend Rs2 billion on buying luxury double-cabin 4x4 vehicles to cushion the tired haunches of its 138 assistant commissioners and commissioners. It appears as if ‘austerity drives’ are designed to accelerate official extravagance with renewed vengeance — akin to dropping a heavy cargo of luxury vehicles on a sinking ship.

What are some practical ways of reining in leaders’ craving to deliver the next salvo of Type 2 eyewash? The first piece of advice for those seeking this treatment is to keep the upper and lower lip tightly glued together for as long as possible. Be brief and use facts, instead of emotions or potboilers. Spend at least as much time on thinking, reading, planning and organising as on making a speech. Next, learn to differentiate between wishes, facts and hot air. Say only what you really mean, what you can actually do, and what you may have already done. Avoid platitudes like ‘this will be the last IMF programme in Pakistan’s history’. Even high school kids can easily see through the cavity of this misused announcement.

The best way to avoid Type 2 eyewash is to be aware of what constitutes an eyewash. Invariably, it is composed of hollow slogans, rusted clichés, ‘austerity drives’, emotional waffle, false promises or a mixture of all these. It is helpful to remember that these are negative motives, with chronic harmful effects in the long run. They are used only to look good, to appease, to fool, and to buy time. A good strategy to avoid this eyewa­sh is to frequently pa­­use and reflect on the ratio of the wheat and chaff in one’s statements and actions. Frequently stepping down from the Type 2 eyewash treadmill and going for a long walk can help restore one’s perspective.

Besides its medical benefits, a long, solitary walk is an excellent opportunity to introspect on what one is trying to accomplish. One must constantly ask as to whether the unending, pretentious rhetoric is backed by facts or is mere eyewash. A simple litmus test for an ‘austerity drive’ is one’s willingness to stop the purchase of all new luxury vehicles and withdraw all 150,000 or so already issued government vehicles, their 5m litres of free fuel per month, their 150,000 drivers and their misuse. If you are not willing, be sure, you are into big-time Type 2 eyewash. If the answer is ‘yes’, you are an upright leader who will be remembered for recovering the pilfered funds and hopefully returning them to their rightful owners — the sanitation workers, security guards, coal miners and the railway coolies of Pakistan.

The writer is an industrial engineer and a volunteer social activist.

naeemsadiq@gmail.com

Published in Dawn, November 6th, 2024

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