All the Pakistan hockey team had to do, was smirk and walk away, letting the scoreboard do the talking for them. Instead, they sent the world a reminder that the principle of ‘sportsmanship’ isn't a prescription for the losing team alone.

Through the course of this article, my signature snark will be delivered in strictly metered doses; so as to not fan disproportional outrage against the players, nor appease those who laugh it off as a complete non-issue.

Beginning with the fact that the athletes were provoked by unruly groups among the Indian spectators who were catcalling the players, the young athletes whipped off their shirts and responded fittingly. Note, “fittingly” does not make it decent or professional.

In pictures: Pakistan vs India: When the shirts came off

I admit, even I spilled my cup of Earl Grey all over my well-starched shirt, at the sight of that dreadful rudeness. I politely asked my maid, Mrs. Judgington, to turn off the telly until the athletes had composed themselves.

There was nothing politically incorrect about the behavior, as far as I can tell; it was not offensive to black people; it did not belittle the tragedy of 9/11; no one suffered head injury or had a concussion; and it did not propagate a ‘deadly’ culture of crude gesturing that paves way to a grotesquely dystopian future.

It’s important to keep the indignation within reasonable bounds. Coach Sheikh Shahnaz, after all, officially apologised for his team’s behavior, and the International Hockey Federation (FIH) examined the incident, arriving at a conclusion that “no further action is warranted”.

The apology wasn’t enough for Hockey India’s furious chief, Narinder Batra, who threatened to suspend playing ties with Pakistan and boycott all future FIH events, demanding that they punish the Pakistani players for their conduct. Some may argue that only half that rage is attributable to the actual misconduct; the other half displaced after losing the match.

Ultimately, FIH rescued its twisted arm by banning two Pakistani players, Amjad Hussain and Tauseeq Ahmed, for one match each.

Here’s the thing, though. The Indian side may be accused of overreacting to this peccadillo, but the Pakistani hockey team did hand them a perfectly legitimate cause for anger.

Seriously, boys. Even if you were being catcalled by the Indian spectators as you allege, all you had to was flutter away with a victor’s contented grin. If you wanted to make a gesture, you ought to have pointed to the scoreboard, upon which a ready-made “booyah!” flashed on your behalf.

Instead, you’ve rewritten the headlines on many Indian newspapers from a humble, “Pakistan defeats India 4-3” to an outraged “Pakistani players hurl obscene gestures at home crowd”.

Today, we should’ve been celebrating your hockey skills. Instead, we’re managing a diplomatic mayhem because you thought your exuberant victory dance was worth tossing the code of ethical conduct out of the window.

Next time, please just make a V-sign with your fingers. It's easier for everybody.

Related:

- Hockey: When we were giants (and then some)
- Shahnaz Sheikh calls upon India to save Pakistan hockey