KARACHI: Please don’t ask me questions about Modi. I’m not here to defend him, and I did not vote for him. This may not sound a funny remark, but the way it was uttered by Indian humourist Sanjay Rajoura during his standup act titled ‘BjPTi Saamne Wali Sarhad’ at T2F on Saturday evening elicited meaningful smiles from a packed audience.

Rajoura, who is known for co-writing and producing the song Merey Saamne Wali Sarhad that a few months back went viral on social media, made it clear at the outset that he was a critic of Indian Prime Minister Narendra Modi.

Taking a jibe at the prime minister, he said he didn’t want democracy in India, of which Modi was a result. He made a few jokes about Modi’s visits to western countries in which he had come up with suggestions like if you turned your wrist watch, you would get Indian standard time. He targeted the non-resident Indians’ (NRIs) fondness for Modi, saying they chanted Modi, Modi with such frenzy that it seemed as if the prime minister was like the pop star Justin Bieber — a Gujarati Justin Bieber.

Rajoura said his own brother and his children, who lived in India, took a selfie with Modi and sent it to him at four o’clock in the morning. It made him realise that he had nurtured snakes in his own house, he said, arguing that how come Modi was their (NRIs) prime minister, he was India’s premier. He also took to the cleaners the claim that a lot of development had taken place in India. In that regard, he mentioned that all he could see was the construction of malls, used by villagers (who visited cities) for going up and down the escalators. People were so taken in by the mall culture that they might even turn some of their sections into maternity clinics so that they didn’t have to go far from facilities like eateries, he commented.

Rajoura said Indians did not take popular slogans seriously, citing the example of the family planning slogan Hum do hamare do. Hinting at population boom, however, he said Amitabh Bachhan’s film Do aur do panch was taken seriously.

On women’s issues against the backdrop of rape incidents that happened in India, he said it was suddenly decided by the government that we should respect women. Therefore, it installed CCTV cameras at various places in Delhi whose footage would first go to police. He remarked that this meant the police would first watch the entire film (of such incidents) and then take action on it.

Although Rajoura said he did not select the title of the show (BjPTi), he did mention his meeting with the PTI chief Imran Khan. According to him, “Imran Khan does not need fans.

He is the biggest fan of himself.”

Rajoura told the attendees that recently the government started a movement for Cleaner India. He raised the question as to how India or Pakistan could be clean. A clean India or a clean Pakistan was an oxymoron, like a happy marriage or good Taliban, he quipped. Unclean atmosphere was what kept India and Pakistan together, he said. He also made the point that human beings did not have control over three things: their country, their religion and their parents. Yet, they fought the most about them, he added.

Published in Dawn, December 6th, 2015