Pfau appeared to mirror the warder’s decision when she first accompanied Berenice, a Mexican nun and qualified pharmacist, to Karachi’s Leprosy Colony on what was then McLeod Road. Whereas middle-class retrospectives of the 1950s and ’60s nostalgically portray Karachi as a clean, lively and beautiful city, a symbol of the religiously inspired ideals of social equality and solidarity upon which Pakistan was founded, Pfau described the wretched conditions of this illegal settlement situated right next to Karachi’s commercial and banking centre: “Here, the poorest of the poor, beggars suffering from leprosy, simply vegetated — in huts made of cardboard boxes, bamboo sticks covered with rotting gunny bags, some just a pair of ragged straw mats joined together — none of them water-proof. And, in the midst of everything, this misery: this lamentable and hopeless misery: deformed anaesthetic hands and feet, a prey for rats at night; filth and vermin; drugs and brawls. About 150 leprosy patients lived here in indescribable filth. Unimaginable, yet real, even by Karachi standards at the time. A colony in the middle of the city, in a kind of hollow which during the rainy season became actually knee-deep in filthy drainage water; a stinking lake of horror and misery.” [sic]
The Marie Adelaide Leprosy Dispensary at the time was a hot, smelly, noisy shack of eight by eight metres with two small windows and no access to water or electricity. A man who was roughly the same age, who possessed the same right to dignity as she did, crawled in on his hands and feet: “Like a dog, on all fours.” And no one seemed the least bit perturbed.
“In the post-war years in Germany people at least used to say, ‘It can’t go on like this any more.’ Here, nobody thought of saying anything like that. … I have rarely, very rarely, attacks of sudden rage, moments in which I am no longer in control of myself. Suddenly I knew — something had to happen here. But how? Something had to be done on the spot. ‘Berenice,’ I said with suppressed emotion, ‘Berenice, it can’t go on any more like this. We will have to do something to change things!’ My heart was pounding. It was like when one meets one’s greatest love. Once and for all times I had now decided. And it was to be forever. And everything else was only the outcome of that moment in the beggar colony in McLeod Road.” [sic]
Pfau began to search for the meaning of life and death when she was a student of medicine. Her parents had fostered in their children an inclination to disobey authority. They were not raised with a specific ideology or system of values. The belief systems and patterns of thought that were emerging in post-war Germany were partly shaped by the cultural and political values of the United States. It was utilitarian, superficial and materialistic and Pfau did not want to be a part of it.
She became interested in Catholicism especially because of its sympathy toward the ‘other’, and its emphasis on mysticism as expressed by Thomas Aquinas: “Man will never be able to grasp even the essence of a single mosquito.” She knew her search had come to an end when she read the words of John of Damascus: “The Divine is incomprehensible and infinite; and this only is comprehensible about it: the infinity and the incomprehensibility.”
She decided that she wanted to enter an order and chose the Daughters of the Heart of Mary, founded by a lady of nobility, that emerged as an underground movement during the French Revolution.
In Pakistan, Pfau felt accepted because of her spirituality and she, in turn, found it easier to live her religious vocation in a society where believing in God and the metaphysical came naturally to people. For her, the “dividing line [was] not Islam and Christianity but spirituality and superficial materialism.”
Gen Ziaul Haq’s laudatory preface to her book does not engage with these philosophical themes that are quite central to the discussion, and actually kindred to that of philosopher-poet Allama Muhammad Iqbal who inspired the movement for Pakistan. Indeed, it would not be farfetched to suggest that Pfau was the embodiment of Iqbal’s concept of insan-i-kamil (perfect human).
Pfau’s relationship with God found expression in her relationship with the world. Her decisive, consistent love for Pakistan in all its beauty and its awfulness was an everyday expression of her love for God and mankind. It was an ishq supreme.
The reviewer is an anthropologist based in the Netherlands
Published in Dawn, Books & Authors, August 27th, 2017