Parents considered medical education of daughters as a ‘safety net’ for them if something went wrong following their daughters’ marriage. According to one female participant, “My parents’ viewpoint is that my beti should be stable enough so that if there are any problems created from the side of the in-laws, she is educated enough to take her life forward.”
Another explained, “Every father knows that if his daughter won’t be settled [in her married life] then she cannot earn money [without a degree] so how will she take care of herself.”
The medical degree was, therefore, to be utilised only in “times of crisis.” According to one female participant, “If we are financially bankrupt and money is needed. Otherwise, I don’t need to necessarily earn.” Another woman remarked, “If my husband is making five lakhs, why should I earn?”
The failure of women to practice medicine is widely understood as the major cause of overall shortage of physicians in a country with a ratio of only 0.83 physicians per 1,000 population.
This meant that many women regarded earning as “optional.” If the woman earned, it was “pocket money for shopping” for her, not to be used for the daily needs of the family, and if she spent it, then it was considered as non-obligatory “sadqa” [alms] towards her family. According to one female participant belonging to a Pakhtun community, men who “eat from the earnings of a woman” are shamed and shunned, since “this is against our ghairat [sense of honour].”
In this sense, the role of the man as the future breadwinner for the family was firmly entrenched in the minds of majority of our participants (both male and female). For men, it was simply not possible “to sit at home and break free bread. How can you be a man and do that?” and it was “simply unacceptable for men to not work.”
In contrast, the woman’s role as a mother was highlighted by many female participants, as stated by one female participant, “this is a system which is made by nature, the mother looks after the child, and the husband works for the family.” The role of the mother, religiously and culturally revered was perceived by many as something that placed women in a superior position to men in an otherwise patriarchal culture. Moreover, this was natural to women because “the way a woman brings up her child, no one else can,” otherwise, “our religion would have said that it is the father’s responsibility that he stays at home and looks after the children.”
However, several women also complained that their inability to practice medicine gets exacerbated following marriage, unsurprising given the responsibilities and uncertainties that marriage can bring. A female student engaged to be married spoke about her mother-in-law’s expectation from her to take care of the household following marriage to “lessen her burden.” Others spoke about the in-law’s expectation for a “riwaitee [traditional] bahu” who makes “gol rotis,” will have a “hot meal ready for the husband” and who will not work.
One woman spoke about a friend who, following marriage, “misses clinics and does not even attend normal classes.” She suspected that this was because “her religious type husband does not let her” and that “she makes excuses for him.” A female participant expressed that “most men do not want equal life partners and do not let their wives work” whereas a male participant added that while “every man wants his daughter to be a doctor, most men do not let their wives [practice].”
Women also spoke about the consequences, including the possibility of a divorce in case of non-conformity with expected duties as wives and daughters-in-law, “What if the marriage falls apart? Phir log kya kaheinge [what will people say then]? People may say that it was because she [the wife] was working.”
Several women pointed to the barriers which women encounter if they wish to practice medicine in Pakistan. Issues mentioned explicitly included long working hours within medicine and poor and unstructured training programs. As expressed by one female participant, “This is not a nine-to-five job. And you have to be there all the time, especially in the case of emergencies.”
Once women have children, the issue becomes magnified. One participant explained, “No woman would want to leave a one-month-old baby at home. If there were day-care centres, then they could take one to one-and-a-half hours off from their duties to spend time with the kid and still be able to work. This would allow women to balance their personal and professional lives.”
Women spoke of a “shift in priorities” following marriage and the internal conflicts women experience “if they are missing their kid’s friend’s birthday party because they were on call.” Lack of basic facilities, particularly in public sector hospitals, was also pointed out by a female participant: “When you are on night duty, there is no proper place to sleep.
So how can women work in such an environment?”
In the face of these structural barriers, women often choose to forego their careers not because they “want” to but because they “have” to, as captured compellingly by a participant, “Should I listen to my heart or them [my husband and in-laws]?”
Our study also uncovered the voices of dissent from women who wished to pursue a medical career and who shared their frustrations and anger with the prevailing sociocultural norms. One woman stated that she would continue to work, “even if my husband is earning 10 lakhs to 15 lakhs.” Another woman, the eldest among all daughters, expressed her determination to pursue a professional career because “I have to ensure that my younger brothers and sisters reach universities and get ahead in life.”