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Mother’s Day: Reflections of a mother

This piece was originally published in Dawn, Young World on May 9, 2020.

Spending sleepless nights while tending to children, feeding them, changing diapers, etc. are a part of life of every mother having infants. When the infants grow up a little, the next phase is to educate them, teach them manners and make them learn to be a part of the world out there.

It is tough to do all that for me, like every other mother. After all it is not all I have to do. One has to focus on one’s career and household chores at the same time, and fulfil one’s duties towards other family members.

Did I mention a “me-time” somewhere in all that I said? I guess not. There is no mentioning of it simply because there is no time left for me while doing all that I do.

It is said that you learn about the true value of parents once you have children of your own. I have found this to be exactly true. The sacrifices and unconditional love it takes to be a mother has certainly made me realise the sacrifices my mother made in bringing me up. Looking back at my life, I wish I could change all those moments in my life when, as a child, I misbehaved with my mother. I also wish that I had spent more time with her and made life easier for her.

As my children grow up, they seem to become less obedient and respectful. This really hurts. I see this as a general trend in all the children, nowadays. With some exceptions, the older they get, the less respect they show to their mother and elders in general.

Having a mind of one’s own is fine, but there cannot be any excuse for bad behaviour towards one’s mother. And also just because your mother is less strict and more friendly than your father, it should not lead you to not show respect to her.

Mothers like me do not want our children to be our puppets. All we ask for is recognition of our love and efforts. Expecting respectfulness is a part of that recognition. Every mother would love her child to come up to her and, as a minimum, thank her for her efforts. It would be great if the child could offer to help her in little ways. If nothing else, they should at least not leave any mess for the mother to clean up!

Mother’s Day is important, but it is more than just a special day. It is really a reminder that mothers deserve our respect and recognition for their love at all times. For a child to have this realisation certainly means more to mothers than having a card or flowers on Mother’s Day. This is because it means that this realisation would translate into care and respect for one’s mother.

For my part, I have started taking care of my mother in all the ways I can. While I do not live with her, I try my best to stay in touch or visit her as much as I can. Taking care of her health and what she wants has become very important for me. It does not matter to me what others do or say about taking care of their mothers. All that matters is what my mother deserves. And that exactly is my message to you all! Do not look at what others do, think of what you can do for your mother, who deserves all the love and respect that one can.

Mothers can be your friends too if you learn to share things with her. It is just a misunderstanding that they would not understand you or what you want. You can talk about anything with her: sports, cartoons, TV shows, super heroes, general knowledge, etc. You would be pleasantly surprised when you do end up confiding in her or discussing things with her.

I am lucky that I get cards and flowers from my family on Mother’s Day. But many things remain left to be desired on the other 364 days of the year. Still whatever my children do the rest of the year, I would never stop caring for and loving them. I guess that’s what the motherhood is all about.

Happy Mother’s Day everyone, but make every day Mother’s Day, for she never fails to make everyday special for her children.

Published in Dawn, Young World, May 9th, 2020

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