Recently, harrowing video footage went viral on social media, which showed a couple of teenage girls pinning a schoolmate to the ground while physically torturing her to the extent that she had to be hospitalised.

The girls could be heard verbally abusing the victim, asking her to apologise for something. What was even more troubling was that at least two other classmates could be seen recording the video of the incident on their mobile phones, while none of them volunteered to help the victim.

After the social media outrage, the Scarsdale International School, where this incident took place, expelled five students — including the victim of bullying. Following this, the District Commissioner suspended the registration license of the school. The DC’s report stated that the students involved in the matter were “friends” and the issue was created over sharing the pictures of a “student party outside the school” with parents.

There was an outcry amongst the general public, supporting knee-jerk punitive measures that did not extend beyond expulsion, arrest and public shaming. Unfortunately, this bloodlust did not come as a surprise to anyone in a country where citizens frequently resort to mob lynching and vigilante justice in the absence of functional social structures.

A recent viral video of an incident documenting bullying has alarmed many in the country about just how pervasive bullying has become today. Is this acquired behaviour? And, if so, who is to blame for this?

Even the fact that those involved in this incident were minors did not deter people from leaking their names, social media accounts and home addresses.

NORMALISING BULLYING

No one is born a bully but rather, they are turned into one.

Institutes are microcosms of society. For instance, at schools or colleges, the culture of ragging has blurred the lines between pranking and traumatising someone, and this cycle of violence is perpetuated by preceding batches who rise to seniority.

According to the ‘Theory of Structural Violence’ coined by sociologist Galtung, there are three levels of violence, which are interdependent and reinforce each other.

Firstly, direct violence, like bullying, is the visible manifestation of underlying invisible violence that goes unquestioned in everyday systems, and is of a physical or psychological nature.

Secondly, structural violence is a product of social injustices and is formed by the existing societal structures that result in unequal rights. It usually expresses itself indirectly and has no directly visible cause, for example gender/ethnic discrimination, unequal access to basic resources and class segregation.

Thirdly, cultural violence legitimises the use of direct or structural violence by way of the prevailing attitudes and norms in society, such as mob violence, sexism and fascism.

According to Dr Hadia Pasha, Associate Director of Counseling Services and Wellness Office at the Aga Khan University (AKU), bullies indulge in aggression to exercise dominance and demonstrate their status in social situations. According to her, what is concerning about the viral video is that the bystanders chose to enjoy rather than stop the offenders.

That means that a part of them blame the victim for bringing the plight upon themselves. If they consider the bullies ‘cool’, they may themselves start engaging in similar behaviours in the long run, which has a snowball effect on bullying culture.

WHAT MAKES A BULLY?

All behaviours are learned. Children learn primarily through modelling, where learning occurs through observation and imitation. Children who have seen their parents be abusive or demeaning to other people are more likely to replicate that behaviour.

Eminent psychologist Albert Bandura demonstrated in his ‘Social Learning Theory’ that children learn new aggressive behaviours by observing aggressive models around us or in the media. Bandura argued that we don’t just imitate the specific behaviours that we see, but that viewing aggression changes our perceptions and attitudes about aggression.

When we live in a society where physical coercion like mugging or domestic violence is rampant, it not only increases a child’s likelihood of being violent, but may also increase the belief that ‘violence is okay’ and that it offers a legitimate way of resolving conflicts.

In my clinical practice, I came across a case where an 11-year-old child was brought in for assessment after he had suddenly started being extremely aggressive by hitting his younger brothers and had also strangled a pigeon.

He later disclosed that, a few months earlier, he had been locked in the school’s bathroom every day for a week by his classmates after he refused to share his lunch. Since he was too embarrassed to tell any adult about this, his way of coping with his pent-up shame and frustration was to displace it on anyone who was ‘weaker’.

The principles of social reinforcement say that, if we are rewarded for being aggressive, we’ll likely aggress again, but if we are punished for our violence, it might deter us from being aggressive in the future.

A child who gets a toy by hitting another child and taking it is likely to continue being aggressive even when he grows up, particularly if he or she is not punished for the action. Children who are more aggressive are also often seen as more competent or ambitious in our society, which encourages this behaviour.

Our behaviour is a product of nature and nurture, so besides the environment, certain personality factors also predispose a person to becoming a bully. The ‘Compensation Model’ of aggression proposes that low self-esteem leads to bullying behaviours, since the bully is subconsciously trying to make up for his perceived or actual inadequacies.

Traits such as narcissism, lack of empathy, lack of emotion regulation, defensiveness and psychoticism make up the psychological profile of a bully. Amongst bullying victims, a myriad of psychological issues are prevalent, ranging from anxiety and depression to suicidal ideation and antisocial traits.

A 21-year-old boy who was addicted to ice and opioids was once brought into therapy. Despite belonging to an upper class family, he had resorted to pickpocketing strangers and stealing drugs from other users due to his addiction. He was also diagnosed with having an antisocial personality and had a history of abusing and mutilating animals.

Upon probing, he revealed that he was sent to a boarding school when he was 12, where his ragging involved seniors molesting him. This incident had left a deep impact on him and, since then, his family reported him becoming aloof and developing disruptive behaviour patterns.

HOW TO CURB BULLYING?

Rather than taking strict corrective measures, which only serve as a band-aid solution, it is imperative that bullies are provided individual and family counselling and behaviour modification therapies.

Since most behaviour is learned, children can also acquire pro-social behaviours through observational learning, if their environment is healthy. Watching someone be respectful, cooperative and demonstrate altruistic acts can teach children to act in a similar manner.

The risk of becoming violent is reduced at an early age by several factors, including social support and a disciplined, stable home environment. Positive relationships with parents and other adults, healthy self-esteem and proactive social values can help children alter their behaviours.

Limiting or eliminating exposure to negative influences like violent games, shows and activities can also help them realise that negative behaviours are not acceptable.

The writer is a clinical psychologist and freelance journalist. She can be reached at rabeea.saleem21@gmail.com

Published in Dawn, EOS, February 12th, 2023