“She asked for it”
The recent spate of gang rapes in India has once again brought into the spotlight the mounting predicament of sexual assault for South Asian women, with no sign of any let up. Hundreds of women commuting in public transport are harassed and threatened publicly every day; however, the authorities continue to live in denial.
According to the International Labour Organisation, Pakistani women travelling in public transport are susceptible to verbal and physical harassment by fellow passengers, drivers and bus conductors. Women in Pakistan represent 51 per cent of the total population, however out of the 60 seats, less than a dozen are reserved for women in public buses which is why women who either manage to secure a spot over the engine or spots in close proximity to male passengers are repeatedly molested.
It is extremely unfortunate that many Pakistanis fail to understand what harassment really signifies. Many consider it to be an act which involves physical or sexual violence directed towards another person; however, it is important to understand that harassment covers wider issues. Any offensive behaviour, whether it is as insignificant as cracking a sleazy joke or as derogatory as touching someone indecently, qualifies as harassment. However, the level of harassment that women face on South Asian streets is a far more offensive crime.
Shifa Ibrahim, a student of undergraduate program at Government College of Commerce and Economics said, “There is a womens section in most of the buses, however, bus conductors and drivers misbehave and harass all college girls. Some of them try to touch us whilst shifting gears or pass inappropriate remarks. They try to grope young girls and it is extremely troublesome for us. Initially, we started travelling in groups to avoid these incidents but then we decided to use rickshaws as commuting in buses has become a nuisance for all of us.”
Ibrahim never dared to report any incident to the law enforcement agencies as she, along with many other like-minded women, does not trust the authorities. It is a well-established fact that Pakistani women feel threatened by law enforcement agencies and can one blame them for their reservations? Pakistani women have suffered much harm at the hands of policemen in the recent past. Not very long ago, five women who went sightseeing to Fort Munro were brutally raped by personnel of the Border Military Police (BMP). Similar incidents have been reported in various parts of the country, where women have been sexually assaulted by men in uniform. And aware of this, rapists and molesters are encouraged by the deteriorating situation.
A woman who uses public transport frequently, complained, “A few days ago a man flashed me and walked away. Thinking enough is enough, I went to the nearest traffic warden and told him what had happened. He replied whilst staring at me inappropriately, ‘I don’t blame the guy for doing what he did because you entice such emotions in men’.”
“The traffic warden’s words crushed me, as I turned away dejected. I, and many others like me, may not be able to afford the comfort and privacy of our own cars. Does that mean we are to be treated with any less dignity?” she asked.
So, when is enough, enough? In our society, girls are taught to be good daughters, wives and sisters but men are barely ever told to respect women.
More often than not, women are blamed for dressing immodestly and “luring” men to sexually assault them; the point to be noted in the case of most South Asian women who use public transport is that generally all of them are covered properly.
Why is it that we want women to cover themselves because that is deemed respectable but refuse to honour them? Why do we murder innocent women and call that a honour killing when most of us haven’t the slightest inclination what honour really means? Why have we regressed to such a point where women are considered nothing but mere commodities?
Many women consider it unnecessary and futile to raise any sort of voice against the molesters because the altercation might result in serious repercussions for them. It would not be unwise to say that every other person in Pakistan has political ties which empower them to use their affiliations unfairly. Unless the government intervenes and passes strict laws to stop street harassment, Pakistani women will continue to face such problems. In year 2010, the Government of Pakistan, passed a historical bill which protected women against sexual harassment at workplace, however, no respite, of any sort has been provided to women who face harassment in other spheres of life.
It is essentially important to understand that harassment is one of the causes which leads to sexual assault and other sex crimes. Unless we all develop a fair understanding of the fact that culprits behind such behaviors must be reprimanded for their misconduct, we will never be able to get rid of street harassment. It is not only the authorities that are responsible for the reprehensible state of affair; we also play an equal part in the crime by showing cowardice and being a victim of bystander apathy.
Women are equally entitled to use public goods and spaces, by harassing them the oppressive men in our society deprive them of a fundamental right: limiting women’s ability to be in public as often or as comfortably as most men.
We have to truly understand that street harassment is nothing women enjoy or find flattering and start treating it as grave ordeal with devastating repercussions.
It is now that enough is really enough; stop commodifying women and start respecting them.
The writer is a Reporter at Dawn.com
Enough is enough
why is it that an event in india makes pakistanis think about such issues? OK, Now that there are people in pakistan thinking about it and discussing it and writing blogs, let us see Pakistan as a nation do something about it!! Merely discussing the events in India and highlighting it in front of the rest of the world will serve no good unless Pakistan can do something about it. Gone are the days when any nation will keep quiet when you are highlighting such issues happening in india- they will in turn ask you “what have you done about it in your own country?”
The way a man treats women can be entirely guaged by how he was brought up. Unless women do not drill into their child’s head that they are not to touch or demean women no matter what the situation, we will continue to have men thinking that women invite rapes. A woman wearing a skimpy outfit does not still give a man the right to misbehave with her. Any man justifying rape of a woman is nothing more than a product of a sick upbringing.
Hefty restitution for harassment, gonad ablation for rape!
Doesn’t matter weather it is India, Pakistan or any other Asian Country, It crime has become the order of the day. less or more, every where females have to face this.
Everything is green and pure in Pakistan. Just say Pakistan zindabad, if you want to live in Pakistan.
Islam teaches utmost respect for women, however Pakistan perhaps is one of the worst place when it comes to respect for women, specially in streets and public places. Harrassment is everywhere and ogling is a common practice in our society. Thanks Faiza for writing about this social evil. This issue needs more attention in media and should be taken up by the people to their law-makers to update and implement the law. Also, parents of male youth should explicitly discuss the menance of this attitude at home and it should formally be part of discussion in the classroom by the teachers.
People who are quoting religious books about decree guiding women dressing up and do’s and dont for women, forget that the same book says that ALWAYS respect a woman. I ask them only one question: Read me a scripture which advocates harassment of women at ANY context. Stop preaching half baked things.
Have to connect anything and everything to Pakistan….. Has the writer ever…ever travelled in bus herself… I doubt… Pakistani girls donot take any touch by anyone and nobody dares to pass any comment in a bus to any lady traveling in the women compartment just for the reason that he will be bitten up if caught misbehaving in any way with our ladies… Pakistani men are sensitive about women in at-least this regard. Yes rapes do happen but harassment on a public bus is impossible in Pakistan….but you have to keep your Indian readers happy….
@Saqib
You seem to be promoting the notion that Faiza should be wearing a burqa at all times and/or not post her ‘snap.’ You can look at a pretty face and let your mind run riot with all sorts of ashleel thoughts; or you can go down on your knees and thank the good lord for creating beauty in His/Her own image and recite these lines from Mughlay Azam: Hazaaron saal nargis apni be-noori pe rooti hai; tab hota hai chaman mein ik deedavar paida.
If your wife/girlfriend looks like Baitullah Mehsud, by all means keep her covered under a double burqa. Personally, I would rather look at a ‘snap’ of Faiza, or Heena, or Veena, or Nusarrat, or,….,or,….or….
@Vijay
All the women you named are honourable Muslim women. Dare you look at them. If are so desparate go have look at dancing bollywwod girls.
why is that most writers dont want to touch the real reason ?
i believe, the real reason is, we(india/pak) dont understand the concept of liberty. you can pretty much solve all the problems in india/pak if only more people were made to understand what liberty is.
this is why some goons can kill people over a movie or a cartoon. if a girl wants to wear jeans, what right does anyone have to prevent her from doing that ? if i want to watch a movie, what right does another person have in preventing me from watching that movie.
asking women to cover up is like a thief telling judge, that he stole only because he say the owner with a gold necklace. no one has the right to dictate how others should lead their lives.
It is women’s fault as they raise their son in such a way that after becoming adult he become problem for women. In India we have saying that a mother is equivalent to 100 teachers. So if they differentiate between their daughter and sons they they are the first culprit of the rough society. This is little bit hard to digest but women should think over it. Most of Asian women wants baby boy and not baby girl as their first born child. Why ???
And then the western world moans at Iran , such things would not happen there at all. Serves the Pakistanis right as they forget their own culture and follow the west. Indians deserve it too as their so called Bollywood is the right place to teach such activities . I am not surprised at all for the vulgar dancing in their films provokes such behaviour.
Seema Mam, do you know which country watches/downloads the maximum porn from internet? So i am sure that is much more ‘vulgar’ than Bollywood dances. And what do you mean “follow the west?” How come the same men become soooo civilized when they come to the west. They see more flesh here than in south asia.
BIBI I agree with you. Unfortunately Pakistanis in general are S.. thirsty from top to bottom. No exception
Both men n women have their hunger…..agree Nasir sahib?
Rape and harassment is about control and violence, NOT sex .. and it’s not unique to Pakistan .. has existed from time immemorial and happens to varying degrees in all parts of the world. The best way to stem this ‘animal’ behavior is to have tough laws, quick prosecution and across the board punishment of the perpetrators .. sorry to say but rape, wherever it happens, is the ideal situation for some Taliban-style decapitations .. punishment must fit the crime!
Nicely written.
It’s time we stopped the rhetoric about respecting a woman because she’s a mother, a sister, a wife or a daughter and start respecting her BECAUSE SHE IS A WOMAN.
Most of what you said, Ms. Faiza Mirza, is true. However, the reason why this happens so much more frequently in some societies is because of their undue and unwarranted repressive nature, either due to religious constraints or the culture of the society. Although such acts do happen in the liberal societies too, but to a very limited extent. Far from being as common as in the more restrictive and repressive societal environments. Man is basically a sex animal but he needs to control himself. Otherwise there is no difference between him and an animal. However, culture and to some extent religion too, play a part in giving buoyancy to such despicable acts, especially in more repressive societies where there are very limited or even non existent secondary outlets. Such heinous acts have nothing to do with how women dress up or behave. In more permissive societies, like the western societies for example, it is very common to see women going around in the tiniest of shorts and no body cares, no body stares at them because it is not considered a taboo for women to be dressed this way. I have lived for many years in Sweden, undoubtedly, the most permissive of all the societies in the world. In summer especially, women are known to cover very little, but sex crimes are rare. It is a wrong notion that women bring these acts upon themselves because of the way they dress up. This is an excuse that men give to move the blame away from themselves and rather portray them as the helpless ones.
So true!! I completely agree with you! I wish we would start discussing the problem as it is!! In cultures of the east, its even a taboo to discuss sexuality and related things within the family. These are natural biological processes and people should talk about it in an open respectful way.
A man who respects a women can respect a women irrespective of how she dresses. And he will not feel aroused by women id he is used to seeing them around. That will happen if gender equality is engendered right from school to workplace, politics and just about everything else.
Rapists are genetically and/or environmentally programmed to target girls/women; there is hardly any evidence that so-called ‘closed’ societies are more vulnerable.
India (New Delhi) is a far cry from being a restrictive and repressive culture. There are stares and glares in ‘ultra-religious’ Saudi Arabia but rapes are virtually non-existent. While the (male) clergy is known to prey on boys, there is little evidence, if any that they harass and/or rape women.
By virtue of exposure to their peculiar environment, the western (men) are become “tolerized or desensitized”. They, however, do use alternative outlets, such as pornography and incest, to satisfy their animal instincts; something far more common in Sweden than the rest of the west.
In my view, the solution to this problem is enactment of tough laws and their enforcement as well as biological therapies, such as anti-androgens, volunatry/mandated orchiectomy, etc.
SO true what you have said here. The worst culprits are the police themselves. When the Law and order keepers are like demons towards what cue will the public take from it. Its sad that the oldest civilisation in the world is highly uncivilised.
Once upon a time, I was watching a cricket match between PK and SA in ‘Pindi and they were the policemen of the Elite unit who were harassing women nonstop.
Pakistani society is homogenous and women are under stringent eyes and are always thought doubtful in character.
Faiza – Most unfortunately, the subject you write about is the shame of India. I wish we had a system of justice that punished these crimes swiftly, without delay and in a manner that discouraged these crimes altogether. I also wish that we didn’t blindly adopt Western culture without thinking. I wish our new modern cities (e.g. Bangalore, etc.) took pride in themselves instead of blindly rushing to embrace everything western just so others call them more International. It’s a shame really.
What has western culture got to do with respecting women? Men in the west BTW are very respectful of women. I have been to the US and I can vouch for that. And that is in-spite of what women wear!!
This is just another instance of blaming everything outside to cover up for our own weaknesses. We have spineless men, because they were not taught how to respect women. Not because they are aping west!!!
I have visited over 30 countries and will say that Pakistan is the worst place for women. My wife and daughter have exactly the same opinion. My daughter was in Uganda by herself for 3 months and she found Uganda a far better place than Pakistan as a woman.
Most comments on the article clearly indicate that men think that women have brought harassment upon themselves by not wearing Islamic dress etc. This is a shocking example of blaming the victim.
I spent 20 years in Africa. I have the same experience as your daughter.
And some of us have the gal to call Africa a dark continent.
Apparently, you expected Africans to be animals but you expect Pakistanis to be saints .. may I say that you are a ‘victim’ of stereotyping.
I do think you get it.